Top Five Wednesday: Double Post

I missed the last T5W. (A sentence you have never heard me say before.) But it was one I didn’t miss on purpose, OKAY? So I’m combining them. Is your body ready? No? Too bad.


Discuss your preferred fancasts for some of your favorite characters. (Fancasts means actors you’d like to play your favorite characters or imagine your favorite characters as)

So…  This is a dilemma. Most of my favorite characters have already been cast into films and TV shows. Some of the castings I loved, and others I very much disagreed with. I’m not going to get into that right now because this post will never end, but JUST KNOW… I have opinions.

Red Queen by Veronica Aveyard

Mare Barrow – Lindsey Morgan (The 100) or Esmeraude Tobia (Shadowhunters)

Mare is described as being of Hispanic and Mediterranean descent, and I think both of these ladies fit the bill. Each of them play kick-ass characters on broadcast television, and I can easily see them filling Mare’s shoes. To be completely honest, I will be happy with the casting as long as they don’t cast a blonde, Caucasian actress to play her.

Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare

Tessa Gray – Jenna Louise Coleman (Victoria, Dr. Who)MV5BMTQ2NjAwMTI2N15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwODk3MjA3NjE@._V1_SY1000_SX1500_AL_

I already know that I’m going to get some backlash for this. The Clockwork Angel characters are so hard to cast because I really just want the perfect people to play them. When searching for fancasts of Tessa Gray, I noticed Sarah Bolger and Astrid Berges-Frisby were mentioned frequently as favorites. However, I don’t really like either one for the part. Jenna Coleman is fantastic in Victoria, and I think she could play the bookish Tessa fairly well. I also liked Alicia Vikander for this part, but I think I would be happy with anyone relatively unknown playing her. As long as they look the part.

Cinder by Marissa Meyer

Cinder – Chloe Bennet (Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.) or Jessica Yu (Awkward)

I PROMISE THEY ARE BOTH ASIAN. Preferably they would get someone younger to play Cinder, but I don’t know about the unknowns. I’m not an agent, and this isn’t star search. (Do you SEE what I did there?)

Uglies by Scott Westerfield

Tally Youngblood – Willa Holland (Arrow)

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Finding an ugly actress in Hollywood is like trying to find a snowball on a beach. I’m not saying Willa Holland is ugly by any means, but I think she could really do Tally some justice. FYI: This film has been “in the works” since ‘nam, and it really doesn’t look like they’re ever going to do anything for it.

The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion

Don Tillman – Matthew Gray Gubler (Criminal Minds) or Jim Parsons (The Big Bang Theory)

I imagined Don as Sheldon the entire time while reading this book. But I think Matthew Gray Gubler could do the character justice as well. It’s a toss up, really.


Discuss the books you’ve picked up because you’ve heard of them in the online book community or platform you use

History is all you left me by Adam Silvera

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I can’t remember specifically which booktuber recommended this book, but I think it’s safe to assume that all of them did. I haven’t started it yet, but I just picked it up this week through Amazon Kindle for $1.99. (HINT HINT.)

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

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This is another book that I recently picked up for $1.99, and don’t remember who I heard about it from. There is so much hype surrounding this book that I’m almost afraid to read it, but I’m sure it will live up to its reputation!

Queen of the Tearling by Erika Johansen

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I stumbled upon this book through ReadbyZoe’s booktube channel. (I promise I came up with my own blog handle without realizing the resemblance.) I loved the cover, and I found the premise very interesting. Although Emma Watson (my QUEEN) is in talks to play Kelsea, I couldn’t see her as such while reading the book. I imagined Kelsea more curvy, like an America Ferrera type. Side note: how cool would it be to have a plus-sized leading actress in this movie?

Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare

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This book has been hammered into my brain by the likes of PolandBananasBOOKS, Abookutopia, Peruseproject, Jessethereader, Tashopolis, etc., etc. If you’ve been with me for a while, you’ll know that I just got around to reading this incredible series last year. Because I am the Queen of being late to the party.

A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness

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Sasha Alsberg of Abookutopia recommended this book to her followers a while back, and proclaimed it her second favorite book. Sasha and I seem to generally have the same taste in books, so how could I say no? And I wasn’t disappointed.

Top Five Wednesday: Classes Based on Books/Characters

It’s back to school season, so let’s discuss some classes you’d like to take either based on books or based on characters’ skills. I ENCOURAGE YOU TO NOT USE HARRY POTTER, because that is too easy. You are supposed to make up your own classes. For example, you could use How to Dismantle a Dystopian Regime for The Hunger Games or Archery 101 with Katniss. 

I have completely failed at the last, idk, 8 Top Five Wednesdays? No, that wasn’t a question. It’s a fact. This one was so fun that I couldn’t pass it up! Apologies for the late post, United States of Books will resume next Friday!

Flying by the Seat of Your Pants 101

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Professors: Will Herondale (The Infernal Devices), Katniss Everdean (The Hunger Games), Tris Pryor (Divergent), Harry Potter (Harry Potter.. oops)

Description: If you’ve ever watched someone more capable than you do something and said “I can do that, hold my beer,” this class is for you. If you’ve ever wanted to save the world without any real plan whatsoever, this class is for you. If trouble tends to seek you out… you get the idea.

Requirements: A desire to “save the day,” general confusion, an “I’ll just wing it” attitude, sass, No. 2 Pencils.

 

How to Get Away With Murder

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Professors: Jill Charron (With Malice), Amy Dunne (Gone Girl), Lizzie Borden (See What I Have Done)

Description: Have you ever wanted to murder someone, but were afraid of the consequences? This class will teach you, essentially, how to get away with murder, from cleaning up crime scenes and having an alibi, to planting evidence. It doesn’t matter what you’ve done, it matters what people think you have done.

Prerequisites: 1001 Ways to Die, Bleach Uses, Seasons 1-8 of Criminal Minds

 

Interplanetary Survival

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Professor: Mark Watney (The Martian)

Description: This class will teach you how to survive on a foreign planet for a ridiculous amount of time without dying or losing your sense of humor. #Hodon’tdoit

Requirements: A tolerance of disco music

Prerequisites: Astronaut Program @ NASA

 

How to Fail at Your Career and Alienate Your Friends and Family

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Professors: Andy Sachs (The Devil Wears Prada)

Description: Do you have a job that “a million girls would die for?” Do you want to succeed in your career, but complain the entire way? This class will teach you how to be as ungrateful for your career path as possible, while nurturing your inability to multi-task. Please note that all assignments are mandatory, even if they are not on the syllabus or discussed in class. Not cooperating will result in your immediate termination from the university and the sabotage of your future career. That’s all.

Requirements: A predisposition toward complaining and general disinterest in the lives of those around you.

 

Occupations for the Undead

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Professors: Matthew Clairmont (A Discovery of Witches), Edward Cullen (Twilight), Vampire Bill (Trueblood), Stefan Salvatore (The Vampire Diaries)

Description: Ever wondered what you should do with all your free time, now that you’re immortal? This class will set you on a blood-free career path to success. Topics covered: Bunnies for Dummies, Love Triangles 101, and The Ultimate Guide to Other Immortals.

Prerequisites: Your own death

 

Top Five Wednesday: Side Ships

Tell us your favorite relationships that don’t involve the protagonist!

We’ll start with the obvious and the one that is probably about to be on everyone’s list.

Ron and Hermione

For the record, I’m so glad J.K. Rowling didn’t have Hermione end up with Harry. Hermione and Ron compliment each other so well, his sense of humor to her practicality, her brains to his… well. We can’t all be geniuses, can we Ronald?

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Prim and Buttercup

Prim and her cat had a better love story than Katniss and Peeta. Buttercup is a mangy, old thing, with distrust of everyone around him except for Prim. When Prim dies, he even goes looking for her. My dog probably wouldn’t have even noticed that I had left.

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They’re even dressed alike!

 

Will Herondale and Jem Carstairs

The ultimate bromance, or… you know… parabatai pairing. Will and Jem are the perfect duo, fighting demons, cracking jokes, and having each other’s back. Jem is the voice of reason to Will’s destructive nature, holding him back from the edge every single time.

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Jamie Fraser and Murtagh

I couldn’t decide if this relationship was more of a bromance or a father-son like relationship, but I definitely like their dynamic. I think they compliment each other well, more or less like Will and Jem, balancing each other out and adding strength to the other’s flaws.

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Jon Snow and Ygritte

I know Jon’s one of the main character’s on Game of Thrones, but we have so many POV characters that it’s hard to tell who’s a main character and who is not. I really liked Jon Snow and Ygritte together. Again, she balanced Jon’s cautious and practical nature out with her fiery and bold personality. Even though it took Jon a while to warm up to her, I think she was good for him and taught him a lot while they were together.

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Top Five Wednesday: Books for your Hogwarts House

I wanted to be as accurate as possible, so I created another account on Pottermore and took the sorting quiz again to make sure. The first and second time I previously took it, I was a Gryffindor through and through. This time, however, I was sorted into Ravenclaw.

I’m having an identity crisis. Which end is up, who am I, what is the meaning of life – crisis.

Also, as an added bonus, I took the patronus quiz. Turns out, I’m a Marsh Harrier. You can imagine my confusion, as there is no such creature in existence in the good ol’ United States of America. No room for birds other than the Bald Eagle. So I looked it up.

A Marsh Harrier is basically a very common British Hawk. A dangerous pigeon, if you will. (Or if you won’t.) Hot damn. Let’s go knock out some Dementors.

Anyway. I’m just going to include both houses.

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My sentiments exactly, El Paso commercial. 

 

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

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Katniss is a Gryffindor through and through. She is endlessly loyal, brave, and daring, taking unnecessary risks in order to protect the people she loves. Prim belongs in Ravenclaw, as she has a ready mind and seems to think a lot more logically than Katniss does. (Peeta is a Hufflepuff, FYI.)

Outlander by Dianna Gabaldon

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With her quick wit, desire to learn, and logical mind, Claire would be definitely be sorted into Ravenclaw. Brawny, quick tempered, and selfless Jamie would be sorted into Gryffindor.

A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness

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This one is incredibly obvious… As university professors and accomplished scholars, both Diana and Matthew would be sorted into Ravenclaw.

The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah

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Isabelle Mauriac, “the nightingale,” would be sorted into Gryffindor for her unbridled bravery against the Nazi’s, loyalty to her fellow rebels in the face of death, and her strong sense of right and wrong.

The Queen of the Tearling by Erika Johansen

the queen of the tearling - erika johansen

Kelsea could go either way. She has a desire to learn and loves to read, but she is also brave and stands up for others. She has a strong sense of what is right and wrong, and she definitely has a lot of nerve. I think I’ll put Kelsea in Gryffindor.

Top Five Wednesday: Favorite Angsty Romances

Talk about your favorite ships that have a healthy side of angst. (definition: adj.: describes a situation or literary piece which contains dark, depressing, angry, and/or brooding emotions from the participating characters.)

My favorite romances are the ones that are minus the angst. There’s allowed to be some drama, but not so much that I am bored by it. Couples that are always fighting or breaking up and getting back together irritate me. Either you love each other enough to stick it out and work out your differences, or you break up. None of this, “but I love him!” crap. This is not a Lifetime movie.

Moving on, here are five angsty romances I have read (NOT my favorites.)!

Juliette, Adam, & Warner in Shatter Me

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Holy enchilada, Batman. If there isn’t some DRAMA in this book. Yes, the angst… BUT THE DRAMA.

Juliette’s romance with Adam was so confusing. One minute he’s an anonymous roommate who kicks her out of her own bed, forcing her to sleep on the ground; the next he reveals that he’s been in love with her since ‘nam. OH YEAH, and she realizes she’s been in love with him too for just as long? Okay. So how did you not recognize each other when you were forced into a prison cell together? Not only this, but she also takes every chance she has to ogle the villain. Who has made it his life’s mission to torture her and hurt the people she loves. Makes sense.

I don’t plan on finishing the series, so I already know she doesn’t end up with Adam (spoiler alert.)  We could have had no other characters in the book and we still could have filled at least 300 pages with whining, crying, sniffing, shivering, shaking, trembling, passive action, insecure comment, etc. I’m sorry if you liked this book, I have a lot of feelings. Read my review here! #shamelessselfpromo

Tris and Four in the Divergent Series

Tris and Four’s romance popped out of a birthday cake and yelled “surprise!” Not that I didn’t see it coming, because how can you expect to read a YA novel and not have some sort of hormone induced romance between the pages?  There wasn’t any sexual tension between them. Their romance came out of nowhere. The only thing I liked about it was that there was no love triangle. I can appreciate the lack of a good love triangle.

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Zelda and F. Scott Fitzgerald in Z: The Beginning of Everything

There’s so much anger between Zelda and Scott throughout the entire book. They were in love, but they actively made each other miserable. Their relationship is just as fascinating as it is tragic. (The series is on Amazon Prime video! Go watch.)

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Sloan and Asa in Too Late

Every relationship in this book was a complete mess. This whole book was a mess. OMG and the baggage… where’s the tylenol?

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Edward and Bella in Twilight

Don’t tell me you didn’t know this was coming.

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Top Five Wednesday: Fictional Jobs You’d Want to Have

Any fictional career you’d want to have? Remember, T5W is always open to movies, tv, and video games as well.

Professor at Hogwarts

Preferably with a delightful Scottish accent. I’m probably in the silent minority when I say I actually loved school, and I think I would be a kick ass teacher. I would probably just mess with my students all the time and get no real teaching done, but it’s fine.

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Gladiator For Olivia Pope And Associates

If I can’t be Olivia Pope herself (Minus the affair with the POTUS because I’m so done with that…) then I want to be one of her gladiators. (A normal gladiator, not a serial killer.) Honestly, I just want a killer work wardrobe and the ability to deliver intense monologues…. I already like red wine, so does that mean I’m halfway there?

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Narrative for Westworld

I was a kick ass barbie doll player when I was little. This is more or less the same thing, but for adults. Actually, it’s probably more like real life Sims. Either way I would crush this. (Preferably without being murdered by Hosts.)

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Professional Time Traveler

I’ve always thought of myself as belonging in another time period, and at the rate I devour historical fiction I would probably fit right in. Not sure how much this pays, but it would surely take up most of my time.

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Tech Analyst At The FBI BAU

Sass and typing, my favorite pastimes.

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Honorable mentions:

Queen of the Andals and The First Men
Oompa Loompa at Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory
Waitress at Luke’s Diner
Raptor Trainer for Jurassic Park
Surgeon at Grey-Sloan Hospital
Superhero Costume Designer for the Incredibles

Top Five Wednesday: Book Trends I’m tired of

“What are some things you are tired of seeing that are trends in publishing? Maybe something that pops up on a lot of covers these days, or the popularity of certain tropes in a particular genre?

The Love Triangle

I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again, I’ll say it a thousand more times. I hate love triangles. They are one of the few things that annoy me about books, television, etc. I get that they are there for the drama and to keep simple-minded people interested, but come ON. They are seriously so unnecessary and really don’t add anything to the plot or help the protagonist grow in any way. The best thing about the Divergent series was that Veronica Roth did not make Tris and Four’s relationship a love triangle, and did the story suffer as a result? (Yes, but not for lack of love interests.) Done. Next.

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Bad Parenting

From Disney to your local bookstore, bad parenting is a trend that has been sweeping the nation for centuries. Why can’t we ever have a book series where the parents are 1) ALIVE 2) Present 3) Loving and supportive 4) Not the villain?? This is a trend in adult novels as well, where the parent is someone that the protagonist wants to get rid of. There are a few contemporary novels that have started integrating good parenting into their ranks, but we almost NEVER see it in any other genre. I get that a responsible, caring parent can be a hindrance when their kid is off trying to save the world, but I’m sure that some author somewhere can provide us with a good example. We’re waiting for you, parents! #Parentslivesmatter

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Insta-love

Hey, I just met you… And this is crazy… But I’m in love with you… So marry me, maybe?

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BYE. DONE. NEXT. 

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Bad YA adaptations

Hollywood has reached a new level of suckitude. I used to get excited when my favorite books were made into films or TV shows, but now I couldn’t be more annoyed. Hunger Games: Disappointing. Divergent: Butchered. Shadowhunters: Embarrassing. Let’s not even talk about The 5th Wave. It’s not like the acting is bad, because they are casting great/well-known actors/actresses for these parts. Of course, while I want to have great actors, I also would rather have someone relatively unknown to play the part. I never see the actresses as the characters they are portraying, and if I go see a movie it is in SPITE of who the actress is. I see it because I already love the book, not because of who is in it. Also, the writing is so CHEESY. They try so hard to be current and funny, but it ends up making me cringe.

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Romanticizing abuse

Fifty Shades of Grey I AM LOOKING AT YOU. Are these the kinds of relationships we want to portray to young impressionable women?

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Hell no. ******

Honorable mentions:

This book is just like (Insert other book)!

No its not. Next.